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Turns out the problem there isn’t the skates, it’s the dogs. They just spin in circles for a while and then start crying.

—Mick Mercury, referring to his rollerskates for dogs business idea[src]

Bartholomew "Mick" Mercury[1] is a childhood friend of Juno Steel, first appearing in "Juno Steel and the Day That Wouldn't Die".

Early Life[]

Mick grew up along with Juno Steel and Sasha Wire in Hyperion City. His uncle gave him a hover scooter when he was a kid, and he gained a reputation as "King of the Highway" because of it, claiming to have been the only one of the neighboring kids to have ever left Hyperion City. Unfortunately, the kids all eventually realized he was lying, and all except for Juno and Sasha stopped hanging out with him. They'd get some drinks in a bar known as the Pour and Floor ("because they pour until you hit the floor!") and joke with Sasha’s little sister, Annie Wire. When Mick was younger, he had a dog named Wilco, but Wilco died after getting shot fifteen times. Since then, he apparently has gotten into the habit of starting or investing in various "business ventures," which never make him any money. A notable example of these would be his "skates for dogs" project, which only made them spin around in circles.

History[]

Personality[]

He is a cheerful fellow and a loyal friend, but not the brightest person. He also has a habit of making up fairly ridiculous stories (mostly about monsters) and ends up being the only one who actually believes them. He seems to wholeheartedly believe in most of his own scams as well.

Episode Appearances[]

Episodes Featuring Mick Mercury
Season 1

Season 2

Season 4

Bonus/Other

Trivia[]

  • According to the podcast's official Tumblr, Mick is one of the only straight people on Mars[2].
  • Kevin Vibert chose "Mercury" and later chose "Bartholomew" as "an inherently funny name." "Mick" being short for Mercury was Sophie's idea.[3]

References[]

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